Michael Phillips

Three Little Graves: What Happens When the System Breaks a Father and Buries His Children

By Michael Phillips

“When a parent dies, the child is called an orphan. When a spouse dies, the other is called a widow. But when a child dies, there is no word. Because no word could ever carry that weight.”

On May 30th, three little girls were handed over to their father for a court-approved visit. Their names were Paityn (9), Evelyn (8), and Olivia (5)—bright, beautiful daughters of a broken American system. It was supposed to be a normal day. A few hours with their dad. A drop-off and pick-up. A routine visitation. And then, a nightmare.

By Monday, the nightmare had a name. The girls were found dead—murdered, zip-tied, and suffocated with plastic bags—dumped at the bottom of a ravine near the Rock Island Campground in Washington state. Their father, Travis Decker, a homeless military veteran suffering from untreated PTSD, vanished into the wilderness, possibly surviving off the grid along the Pacific Crest Trail. As of this writing, he’s still missing. But the damage has already been done. The kind that can never be undone.

Three little girls. Gone.

A Father Failed—But Not Just by Himself

There is no excuse for what Travis Decker did.

But there is an explanation—and it’s one America must confront.

Travis Decker was, by all accounts, once a good father. He was involved. Present. Active. He adored his daughters. His own family described him as a “girl dad” who loved teaching them about nature and survival skills. But somewhere along the way, something broke. Whether it was war, divorce, poverty, trauma, or the merciless cruelty of the family court system, something inside Travis fractured. And instead of being given help, he was given paperwork. Instead of support, he was given deadlines. Instead of therapy, he was given legal fees. And ultimately—he was given time alone with his children, despite being homeless and mentally unstable.

What do you expect to happen when you give a man a broken mind, no support, no housing, no dignity, and then hand him the three things he loves most in the world with no oversight?

The Weight of What Was Lost

We cannot let this be a story that gets buried under headlines and forgotten after the manhunt ends. Because this isn’t just about one man’s collapse—it’s about a system’s collapse.

This is about:

  • A family court that blindly enforced visitation without real mental health evaluations.
  • A CPS system that failed to see a father in crisis as a danger.
  • A nation that lets veterans spiral into homelessness, untreated, and unseen.
  • A culture that ignores complex trauma until it becomes tragedy.

This is about how we keep pretending that giving people access to their children is the same as helping them be parents. How we talk about “co-parenting” like it’s a checkbox instead of a sacred duty. How we reduce fathers to either villains or wallets, but rarely see them as human beings in need of healing.

And most of all—this is about three babies who didn’t get to grow up.

Olivia, Evelyn, Paityn: Names the World Should Remember

These girls weren’t statistics. They weren’t cautionary tales. They were children. With dreams, favorite songs, inside jokes, and birthdays they’ll never have. They should be running barefoot through grass, blowing out candles, making friendship bracelets. But instead, their names are being read by coroners, not teachers. Their futures stolen. Their lives erased in one horrific act of despair.

We must say their names. Not just now, but always.

Olivia. Evelyn. Paityn.

Who Do We Blame?

Yes, we blame the father. There’s no way around it. Travis Decker committed an unthinkable act. He broke the sacred bond of fatherhood in the most violent way imaginable. But we cannot stop there.

We must also blame:

  • The judge who approved this unsupervised visit without question.
  • The attorneys who weaponized custody like it was a sport.
  • The mental health professionals who weren’t called.
  • The CPS workers who didn’t flag the obvious risk.
  • The state that allowed a homeless man to have unsupervised visitation with three small children in the woods.

And we must ask—what is this system for, if not to prevent this?

When Is Enough Enough?

This isn’t the first time the family court system has failed. It won’t be the last—unless we abolish it as it currently exists. What we have today is not a court of justice. It is a bureaucratic battlefield, a profit machine for attorneys, and a psychological meat grinder for parents. Fathers come in asking for help, and come out accused, broke, broken—or worse.

This system doesn’t resolve conflict. It intensifies it.
It doesn’t protect children. It gambles with their lives.
It doesn’t help families heal. It helps them collapse.

And in the case of Olivia, Evelyn, and Paityn, it helped them die.

A Call for Radical Reform

If you are a parent, advocate, survivor, or human being who sees the unbearable tragedy of this case, you must act:

  • Demand mental health and trauma-informed evaluations in all custody cases.
  • Demand supervised visitation until stability is established.
  • Demand real oversight of judges and attorneys.
  • Demand that family court be governed by constitutional protections—not closed-door discretion.
  • Demand support for veterans and parents suffering from PTSD.
  • Demand accountability for those who failed to act.

And most of all—demand that we never let this happen again.

What Justice Looks Like Now

There is no justice for three dead little girls. There is no courtroom ruling or manhunt resolution that can bring peace. But we can make their names matter. We can build something new. Something honest. Something that sees parents as people, not pawns.

Let the lives of Olivia, Evelyn, and Paityn be the last straw. Let them be the reason we finally tear this system down and rebuild it into one that protects, supports, and heals.

They deserved to grow up.

And we failed them.

🕊️ In memory of Olivia, Evelyn, and Paityn Decker.

We will not forget.

About the Author
Michael Phillips is a writer, father, and advocate for family court reform. He is the founder of Father & Co., Republic Dispatch, and REBUILT Justice Project, where he documents the devastating impact of corrupt custody systems, judicial abuse, and parental alienation. After being denied access to his own child and watching countless others suffer in silence, Michael now writes to expose the truth, support erased parents, and demand the overhaul of America’s broken family courts. He is building a platform to help others survive—and rebuild.

🔗 To support investigative journalism like this and push for family court reform, visit Father & Co. on Substack or donate to support independent journalism. Read more stories, share your own, and help us make sure no parent ever walks this road alone.

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